I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
