brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Randomize
