I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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