YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
