he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Randomize
