i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
it's like heaven, but drunker
You're like the curious george of whores
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
