Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
My legs feel like baby dolphins
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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