What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
