Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
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I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
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the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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