I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
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