He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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