At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
