i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
