I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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