Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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