CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
