You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
