Will you blow on my dice?
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
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