just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Use "feeling words"
Yay
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
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