Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
