party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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