We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize