ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Text me some of your sweat
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
