He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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