i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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