Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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