the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
