we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
