I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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