just come out here and I will go home with you...
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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