Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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