so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
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