so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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