:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
