To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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