I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
