currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize