Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
