Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
