is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Randomize
