you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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