I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
