i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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