Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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