You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize