Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Randomize
