did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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