So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Randomize