Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
