His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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