How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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