where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Banned from zoo.
Again?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
is it fun? or sober?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
