New invention idea: vibrating tampons
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
